July Strangies: Stewart 3, Leno 3, Fallon 3, Ferguson
3, Letterman 2, Kimmel 1
(I was on vacation July 1 - 10.)
11 Strangie to Jay Leno: Our
Women's Soccer Team waxed the Brazilians in the World Cup.
Tuesday, July 12 Strangie to Jon
Stewart: Wyatt Cenac, Senior Debt Correspondent: Republicans are job
creationists. We know the rich create jobs. Democrats believe that jobs
just EVOLVE from millions of years of stimulus packages.
Wednesday, July 13 Strangie to Craig Ferguson: On
a roller coaster I love the way the wind whips through my hair. That's
why I never wear pants.
Thursday, July 14 Strangie to Jon
Stewart: If Social Security checks don't go out on August 3 it'll just
be old people, and they'd just blow it on medicine and hips.
Friday, July 15 Strangie to Jimmy
Fallon: Thank you, Arnold Schwarzenegger for starring in an upcoming
western "The Last Stand." It'll probably be good for you to shoot some
blanks for awhile.
Monday, July 18 Strangie to Craig Ferguson: It
was so hot in Washington they had to put a fan on the debt ceiling.
Tuesday, July 19 Strangie to David Letterman: Top
10 things going through Rupert Murdoch's mind during the pie attack: 2.
Don't pie me, bro!
Wednesday, July 20 Strangie to Jay Leno: A
22-year-old woman has a third nipple on the bottom of her foot. Bet
that makes it really tricky to buy a bra.
Thursday, July 21 Strangie to Jon Stewart: Of all
my issues with Michele Bachmann's brain, migraines don't even make the
Friday, July 22 Strangie to
Jimmy Fallon: Thank
you, libraries, for being a place to store all the old people we're not
Monday, July 25 Strangie to Jimmy Kimmel: With
all the costumes, Comic-Con is like a gay parade for people with no
Tuesday, July 26 Strangie to Jay Leno: A whole
town in South Dakota is for sale for $799,000. It has 12 acres, a
post office and 15 Starbucks.
Wednesday, July 27 Strangie to Jimmy Fallon guest
Fran Lebowitz: Bipartisan politics is like anything else starting with
"bi." That means you did it once.
Thursday, July 28 Strangie to David Letterman:
Borders and other bookstores are closing. The problem is, they never
recovered from Snooki's memoir.
Friday, July 29 Strangie to Craig
Ferguson: "Cowboys and Aliens" is out today. Daniel Craig is a cowboy
who fights the aliens with a hi-tech bracelet. He doesn't know how it
got there. He just woke up one morning with a bracelet on his wrist.
He's like a Wild West version of Lindsay Lohan.