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Videos, Castro Photos, Funny Pictures & Late-Night-TV Zingers

by Strange de Jim

July 2009

 

July began with a wish for a Happy

Indy Pendants Day

 

Videos

The best video of the month has to be Conan O'Brien having William Shatner read Sarah Palin's farewell speech as beat poetry, with a bass and bongos. The video has been removed from YouTube, but here it is on NBC's site.

 

Below is Jimmy Kimmel's promo for the new series "hung."

 

Below is a tribute to the late actress who played her: "Mrs. Slocombe's Pussy."

 

Below is the making of an incredible sand painting.

 

Below is the viral sensation made by a band who had a valuable guitar broken by United Airlines.

 

Below are amazing 3-D projections on buildings. Some make the buildings look like they're collapsing..

 

Below is Rob Dougan clubbed to death.

 

Below is Sense & Sensibility & Sea Monsters.

 

From Matt Gibbons

Click for What's Opera, Doc?

 

Castro & Other Photos

Somebody told me Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett died.

Click for thousands of people doing an Eternal Moonwalk.

 

Here are my pal David Cates and I contemplating "Tasty Salted Pig Parts" during my Strange Birthday Celebration July 9.

Click for lots of fun birthday photos.

 

 

Sidewalk art created July 10 on Market Street, just east of Sanchez.

 

Here's the dome at the Main Library.

 

Urban Safari now has a stop on Market Street just east of Noe.

 

Here are Given Gifts owner Nick Romero and artist/clerk Matt Gibbons hosting a party at Given for artist Michael Murphy. Click for his art.

 

From the same party here are yours truly, my roomie Stephen, Bruce Beaudette and Sister Dana van Iquity.

 

From Tom and Cindy Morse

Only in America ......do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front. Only in America......do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.

EVER WONDER: Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed? Why don't you ever see the headline 'Psychic Wins Lottery'? Why is 'abbreviated' such a long word? Why is it that doctors call what they do 'practice'? Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons? Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker? Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes? Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections? Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

Tom and Cindy also sent this photo: The Kids Took Away Their Car Keys.

 

Sent by Gregg Slapak

 

Taken by Jim Hair

Click for more Jim Hair photos.

 

From Neatorama.com

Click for the link to the wedding site. Below is the processional video.

Click for more Style Your Garage options.

Click for amazing shadow art.

Click for Aurora photos.

Below is the choir video.

Click for rifle cupholder. The recoil puts a great head on your beer.

Click for fantastic architectural art.

Click for passed-out yoga poses.

Click for 3-D paintings.

 

Late-Night-TV Zingers

July wins: Letterman 7, O'Brien 7, Fallon 2, Kimmel 1, Stewart 1, Ferguson 1, Colbert 1

July 1, 2, 3 Dave. Conan, Jimmy, Jimmy, Craig and I were all on vacation.

Monday, July 6 winner: David Letterman: "Alaska Governor Sarah Palin is stepping down. Something I said?"

Tuesday, July 7 winner: Conan O'Brien: "On his trip President Obama met with one Russian leader, then screwed off his head and met with a slightly smaller Russian leader."

Wednesday, July 8 winner: Conan O'Brien: "Oscar Meyer's funeral is going to be open bun."

Thursday, July 9 winner: David Letterman: Top Ten Reasons To See The New Movie "Bruno": 6. Don't you want to see a crazy gay Austrian who isn't the governor of California?

Friday, July 10 winner: Conan O'Brien: "The Octomom thought she was being haunted by a ghost. She heard a voice calling, 'Mommy.' Turned out it was just the wind whistling through her uterus."

Monday, July 13 winner: Jimmy Fallon: "Cops today went after some Levitra thieves. Not right away, but when the moment was right for them."

Tuesday, July 14 winner: Conan O'Brien: "The man with the world's largest penis was denied a role on the new show 'Hung.' But I'm not at all bitter." Andy Richter: "If that were true, would you need all this?" (Indicates elaborate new set.)

Wednesday, July 15 winner: Jimmy Kimmel: "They ought to restore the balance in the celebrity universe by giving Michael Jackson's kids to Jennifer Aniston."

Thursday, July 16 winner: Jimmy Fallon: "Police were forced to kill three cougars that were menacing humans. So next year the show will just be 'Desperate Housewife.'"

Friday, July 17 winner: David Letterman: "There are only four phone booths left in all of New York City. There's almost no place left to urinate."

Monday, July 20 winner: "The Daily Show:" Guest Brian Williams: "I wanted to be Walter Cronkite. For me he was sort of like Carrot Top is to you." Jon Stewart: "And how does it feel to have fallen so short?"

Tuesday, July 21 winner: Craig Ferguson: "Today is Belgian Independence Day. Belgium is where you go for a little while before you go someplace else. It's the Jennifer Aniston of countries."

Wednesday, July 22 winner: David Letterman: "Solar eclipse in Asia yesterday. Rush Limbaugh says it proves the unreliability of solar power."

Thursday, July 23 winner: David Letterman: "Amy Winehouse launched a new fragrance. I'll just bet she did."

Friday, July 24 winner: David Letterman: "Sarah Palin says she's leaving office to spend more time tracking down her escaped son-in-law."

Monday, July 27 winner: Conan O'Brien had William Shatner deliver Sarah Palin's farewell speech verbatim in the style of a beatnik coffee house poetry reading with bongos. See the video above..

Tuesday, July 28 winner: Stephen Colbert: "I'm upset at Obama's profiling of Officer Crowley. A President shouldn't get involved in a local city-specific incident. President Bush never did, no matter how flooded the city got."

Wednesday, July 29 winner: David Letterman: "Swimmer boy Michael Phelps lost a big race to a German, but the German was wearing a buoyant, friction-reducing, polyurethane suit. I know that helps, because I wore one on my wedding night."

Thursday, July 30 winner: Conan O'Brien: "Obama's Beer Summit got off to a rough start when a neighbor called the police and said Gates was breaking into the White House."

Friday, July 31 winner: Conan O'Brien: "China has closed its new Love Land Sex Park. Everyone was grossed out by Splash Mountain."

For all the July late-night jokes go to www.strangebillions.com/zingjul09/.

Late-Night Host Products

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Click to see my photo history of San Francisco's Castro.

 

Heck, you might as well check out all my books.

Click for free text

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. Milk is out on DVD (Left) and Blu-ray (right) .

Milk movie: photos and videos of the making of the film and the subsequent openings, award ceremonies, etc. See http://www.flickr.com/groups/milkmovie/

Other Books, CDs & DVDs I
Found Good &/or Funny

www.strangebillions.com/fun/

 

Here are Amazon.com's Current Top Gay Books.

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Amazon's Top Humor Books

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Amazon.com's Top Stand-Up Comic DVDs

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Kindle

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© 2008, 2009 by Ash-Kar Press