Tuesday, August 2 Strangie to Jimmy Fallon: On the new season of "Jersey Shore" you'll get to see Florence, Italy, through Snooki's eyes. And you'll get to see Naples through J. Woww's tee-shirt.

Wednesday, August 3 Strangie to Jay Leno: In ten years the debt will be $27 trillion dollars. But that will be President Bieber's problem.

Thursday, August 4 Strangie to Conan O'Brien: The whole 4th season of "Jersey Shore" takes place in Italy. I had no idea the Pope even had a hot tub.

Friday, August 5 Strangie to Craig Ferguson from Paris: In France it's still OK to smoke after sex. You just have to ask everybody else in the elevator first.

Monday, August 8 Strangie to Jimmy Kimmel: Wall Street got so hammered today Ronnie and The Situation tried to have sex with it.

Tuesday, August 9 Strangie to Jon Stewart: "Newsweek" used a photo to make Michele Bachmann appear crazy. That's what her words are for.

Wednesday, August 10 Strangie to Conan O'Brien: Snooki announced she's releasing her own fragrance. Nobody had the heart to tell her she already has.

Thursday, August 11 Strangie to Jon Stewart: Indecision 2012: Ames, Iowa: Corn Polled Edition: Sarah Palin is bringing her bus to Iowa. She's not going to be part of the debate, just close enough to drown it out. I swear she's going to run for Mayor of Cockblockington.

Friday, August 12 Strangie to Jay Leno: Michele Bachmann was asked if she was a submissive wife. She said no, but her husband is.

Monday, August 15 Strangie to Jimmy Kimmel:  I went to one restaurant in Chicago, they had duck testicles as an appetizer. What? Like I'm not going to order them? Well, they look like any bird testicles. Actually they look like white beans, and they taste like chicken testicles.

Tuesday, August 16 Strangie to Conan O'Brien: Mitt Romney said he was in Iowa when he was actually in New Hampshire. He explained, "I accidentally mixed up my sea of white people."

Wednesday, August 17 Strangie to Jimmy Kimmel: Rick Perry is for small government, and he knows how to shoot a grenade launcher. He's like the Sarah Palin of politics.

Thursday, August 18 Strangie to Conan O'Brien: Gerard Depardieu has apologized for urinating on the floor of the first class cabin of an airline. He said, "I'm sorry. I thought I was in coach."

Friday, August 19, all shows in reruns.

Monday, August 22 Strangie to David Letterman [A terrorist had threatened to cut out his tongue]: Tonight you people are more to me than an audience. You're more like a human shield.

Tuesday, August 23 Strangie to Chelsea Handler: Megan Fox is having her Marilyn Monroe tattoo removed. Ben Gleib: That bums me out, because now I have to have the Marilyn Monroe tattoo removed from my Megan Fox tattoo.

Wednesday, August 24 Strangie to David Letterman showed a clip of Rachel Maddow, supposedly on her own show: Heightened security around the Ed Sullivan Theatre after David Letterman was threatened on an Al Qaeda website. The host is keeping a low profile, only venturing outside when he leaves the office at precisely 9:45 p.m., when he gets into his electric blue Toyota Prius for the ride to his home at 97 Fillmore Place in Larchmont, New York, third house on the left from the corner, with the blue shutters. Security password, sadly, is D-A-V-E. You can also track Dave on the new NBC Dave Tracker iPad app.

Thursday, August 25 Strangie to Craig Ferguson: On the "Today Show" today they had a 75-year-old woman on. Not Kathie Lee or Hoda, a different 75-year-old woman, who had double-D breast implants. They could save her life. "I've fallen and I bounced back up!"

Friday, August 26 Strangie to Craig Ferguson: It's true. An intern here opened a threatening letter which contained white powder. It turned out to be harmless, and that's a shame, because I feel we have too many interns around here.

Monday, August 29 Strangie to David Letterman: Dick "Kaboom" Cheney has written a book, and he says he wouldn't change anything. He feels strongly about this. He'd still invade the wrong country.

Tuesday, August 30 Strangie to David Letterman: After Hurricane Irene the power was off in the neighborhood, and the neighbors came over because they could hear my generator, which keeps the electric fence going. They wanted to know if it would be all right if they came in and watched Leno.

Wednesday, August 31 Strangie to Jimmy Fallon: Simon Cowell wants to be cryogenically frozen when he dies. And it looks like his nipples are off to a head start.