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Castro Photos, Funny Pictures & Late-Night-TV Zingers

by Strange de Jim

August 2009



 

Merlin

I was bowled over by "Merlin" a BBC series, the first season of which has just concluded on NBC and is available free online.

Prince Arthur Pendragon and Guinevere have not yet fallen in love. King Uther Pendragon has outlawed magic in Camelot, so Prince Arthur's servant Merlin and the king's adopted daughter Morgana have to hide their magical powers. Merlin gets advice from the king's physician Gaius and from the Great Dragon (voiced by John Hurt) which the king has chained in a cave. The dragon cannot be freed unless magic returns to the kingdom. From time to time the characters have to bargain with Death, Nimueh For example, when Merlin wants her to bring Prince Arthur back to life, the balance must be kept; someone else must die in his place. Most of the characters are true and noble; the plots and sets are wonderfully operatic. You can watch all the episodes in their entirety at www.nbc.com/merlin. I strongly recommend watching the last four episodes of the first season.

The Moment of Truth (Merlin and Arthur leave Camelot to protect Merlin's village from invaders.) http://www.nbc.com/merlin/video/episodes/#vid=1145273

The Labyrinth of Gedref (Arthur kills a unicorn and must pass magical tests to remove the blight and drought that have fallen on Camelot overnight.) http://www.nbc.com/Merlin/video/episodes/#vid=1145249

To Kill the King (Morgana is in a plot to kill King Uther to avenge the death of her own father and of Guinevere's father, whom Uther executed without even giving him a chance to tell his side of the story.) http://www.nbc.com/Merlin/video/episodes/#vid=1148718

L'Morte De Arthur (Arthur is bitten by a venomous magical beast, and Merlin battles Death for his life.) http://www.nbc.com/Merlin/video/episodes/#vid=1148675

Castro Photos

A sign in the window of the bar named after slain gay rights leader Harvey Milk congratulates him on being awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom, the highest civilian honor in the United States. Harvey's is at 18th and Castro.

 

Here is President Obama presenting the medal to Harvey's gay nephew Stuart Milk.

Click for a free photo history of Harvey Milk.

Click for an account of the making of the Oscar-winning movie Milk.

 

Here's a video of the ceremony.

 

Battlehooch performs at 18th and Castro.

 

A dancer performs in drag in the new plaza at Castro and Market.

 

Wait, she's part of a whole troupe.

 

The same sidewalk artist whose work I showed last month at Market and Sanchez, did a new drawing at Dolores and Market.

 

Videos

100 Years of Special Effects

 

Fry & Laurie New Heart Sketch

 

Kierkegaard

 

Ultimate George W. Bush Moments

 

Sent by Cindy Morse

What if the U.S. loses?

 

From Neatorama.com

Click for Ashleigh Brilliant tees

Click for more billboards that don't belong together (and see two more below).

 

Click for more on the building.

Click for Lombard Street Candyland.

Click for color picker pen.

Click for more death masks of the famous (and see three below).

Click for more oddly named places.

Click for more zombie song lyrics.

 

Get Real by Donald Westlake

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Get Real by Donald Westlake, Grand Central Publishing, 2009. Dortmunder and crew get signed up to pull off a heist on a reality TV show. Television isn't something you watch. Television is something you appear on. - Noel Coward

Page 3 - ... until Murch's Mom made the right turn into Eighth Avenue and sank contentedly into the perpetual blockage there, a traffic snarl well into its second century.

6 - "Of course he's legitimate," Dortmunder said. "We're the ones that aren't."

45 - "The idea of the flat tax is, you just pay the same as one month's rent."

58 - ... the two nearer lanes headed for the Holland Tunnel and New Jersey, the farther happier lanes not.

139 - Andy, speaking with great sincerity, said, "I can guarantee you, Doug, we stay away from violence completely unless there's absolutely no way it can get back at us."

147 - "No, no," the kid said, rattling the ladder a little. "One of those things that's like a toilet but isn't." "Oh," Kelp said, "a bidet," pronouncing the T. Dortmunder said, "Is that how you say that?" "How would I know?" Kelp asked. "I never had to ask for one."

172 - Once away from the cameras and the role-playing, Dortmunder found himself returning to his right mind.

184 - Friday, Dortmunder figured, would probably be a good day to take May and go for a ride on the Staten Island Ferry. She could use a day off, and they hadn't been to sea for a long time.

220 - Tiny told him, "What you want to do is, when in Rome, don't be Greek."

244 - [Instructions from the TV director] "It would be nice if you could be reminiscing, you know. about other robberies you did. How you found out the target was there, and how you did it, and how you got away." "And how," Tiny said, "the crime remained unsolved until now."

Late-Night-TV Zingers

August wins: Letterman 7, O'Brien 7, Fallon 3, Kimmel 3, Stewart 1

Monday, August 3 winner: Jon Stewart: "A guy had sex with the same horse twice, and would have gotten away with it if the horse hadn't bragged about it on Facebook." (Showed post from Equus77.)

Tuesday, August 4 winner: Jimmy Kimmel: "The President turned 48 today, if you believe he was born at all. What do you get for the man who has Oprah?"

Wednesday, August 5 winner: Jimmy Kimmel: "When the plane landed back in the US Clinton was told, 'Please return your journalists to their original upright position."

Thursday, August 6 winner: Conan O'Brien: "Bill Clinton was seen in a Korean massage parlor yesterday negotiating his own release."

Friday, August 7 winner: Conan O'Brien: "A TV newscaster was fired for being too gay when he stood behind his co-anchor and announced, 'This just in.'"

Extra report: Sunday, August 9 Joan Rivers Roast printable winner: Host Kathy Griffin: "And now I'm going to do something that's never been done in a Hollywood pitch meeting, bring up Tom Arnold." All the jokes below under August 9.

Monday, August 10 winner: Conan O'Brien: "They're now making ice cream with Viagra. It's for the man who wants an erect penis but doesn't want to see it."

Tuesday, August 11 winner: Jimmy Fallon: "Miley Cyrus said it wasn't a stripper pole she used on the 'Teen Choice Awards.' It was an abstinence pole."

Wednesday, August 12 winner: Conan O'Brien: "President Obama said in a town meeting that he's not going to pull the plug on Grandma. There was an awkward moment when Grandpa stood up and booed."

Thursday, August 13 winner: Jimmy Fallon: "In France a Muslim woman wasn't allowed in a swimming pool in a burqini, which covered her entire body. She'd even had a burqini wax on her eyebrows."

Friday, August 14 winner: Jimmy Fallon: "Have you seen the new show 'Town Hall Fight Club?'"

Sunday, August 16 special report winner: Ron White: "My old lady and I were going at it when the cleaning lady walked in, which is WAY better than the other way around."

Monday, August 17 winner: David Letterman: "Rosie O'Donnell is breaking up with her partner. Kelly gets the house, and Rosie gets the tugboat."

Tuesday, August 18 winner: David Letterman: "Did you know 90% of US paper money has traces of cocaine? Talk about stimulus money! At least American money is worth something now."

Wednesday, August 19 winner: David Letterman: "Squeaky Fromme is out of prison. There aren't many jobs for unstable gun-toting women, unless she wants to be Governor of Alaska. I apologize for that joke. Sorry, Squeaky."

Thursday, August 20 winner: David Letterman: "A storm leveled trees in Central Park. Donald Trump said, 'It's a start.'"

Friday, August 21 winner: David Letterman: "The Hippocratic Oath requires the doctor to keep you waiting in your underpants for at least ten minutes."

Monday, August 24 winner: Conan O'Brien guest Bill Maher: "I'll show you Barack Obama's birth certificate if you show me Sarah Palin's high school diploma."

Tuesday, August 25 winner: David Letterman: "Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke replaced Alan Greenspan, who got into trouble arranging dog fights. Now Bernanke just has to pass the gender test."

Wednesday, August 26 winner: David Letterman: "Martha's Vineyard has a drink to honor the President's visit, the Obamarita. George W. Bush inspired the Mohidiot."

Thursday, August 27 winner: Conan O'Brien: "It's so hot today I slipped in a puddle of Joan Rivers."

Friday, August 28 winner: Jimmy Kimmel: "California is $30 billion in debt with no way of paying it off, so we decided to set the state on fire and collect the insurance money."

Monday, August 31 winner: Conan O'Brien: "Madonna is going to visit the Wailing Wall in Jerusalem. Yes, the crumbling edifice thousands of people have stuck things into is going to visit the Wailing Wall."

For all the hundreds of August late-night zingers click here.

Late-Night Host Products

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Click to see my photo history of San Francisco's Castro.

 

Heck, you might as well check out all my books.

Click for free text

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. Milk is out on DVD (Left) and Blu-ray (right) .

Milk movie: photos and videos of the making of the film and the subsequent openings, award ceremonies, etc. See http://www.flickr.com/groups/milkmovie/

Other Books, CDs & DVDs I
Found Good &/or Funny

www.strangebillions.com/fun/

 

Here are Amazon.com's Current Top Gay Books.

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Amazon's Top Humor Books

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Amazon.com's Top Stand-Up Comic DVDs

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Kindle

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© 2008, 2009 by Ash-Kar Press